Tips & Tools

Full on fake it to make it

Faced with something challenging or new, ask yourself the simple question, if I did know how to do this, what would I do?

Really start to get into this mindset – let it sink in.

• What would you be thinking if you knew this was no problem at all?
• What would you be saying if you knew this was actually piece of cake?
• What would you be wearing if you knew you had this all wrapped up?

Confidence is key

Then without any self-criticism or self-doubt, act as if you are a boss & know exactly what you are doing.

Observers around you will see this and have faith in you, this faith will lead to positive feedback and boost the cycle of success and, as a result, you will have more faith in yourself.

Shhhh Keep it quiet

Please don’t tell anyone that you don’t really know, what you are doing. This will have the opposite result as you are more likely to fail.

Figure out your joy 

Look back over your life so far in stages of decades and choose an achievement that you are particularly proud of. Ask yourself, what patterns do you notice. What gives you the greatest sense of joy. 

• What are you saying to yourself
• Who are you being
• What did you feel about yourself

Create a statement of purpose

Taking the information from the previous questions, decide on a statement that you felt at the time. 

Yes I can or Don’t lose hope…. Now you have your statement it’s time to think where to put this or these statements so it really sinks in for you.

Align yourself

Now it’s time to start standing up for what you believe in. Look at all aspects of your life and if there are areas that don’t meet this, then take action and align with your statement of purpose. Instead of being stuck in these areas, use your power of thought. You’ll live a more fulfilling life as a result of this change of attitude to it.

You constantly compare yourself 

We’ve all done it and, to be fair, it is human, however the thing is no-one is perfect, so no matter what the outside packaging or the social media posts look like, it in no way mirrors what may truly be going on inside, however you could be making up your own version nonetheless. 

So, what shall we do about this… Let’s reverse a bit and find the triggers that make you start feeling terrible about yourself and start making some changes, so if hanging out with a particular group doesn’t leave you feeling the best or following certain people on Instagram. We know we compare ourselves however if you base yourself on this, it’s a problem 

You have big ideas, but have done nothing to get there. 

It doesn’t matter what this great idea is or how long this has super dream has been going around your head, if you haven’t done anything about it. Which leads me to ask why this idea is just sitting there in the corner. Is it to do with the little big voice telling you basically you can’t do it.

So, what shall we do about this…

Make a list of all the things this little big voice says about your idea. Against each statement, write the exact positive thought.

E.g. You’re too old to do that…now becomes, it’s NEVER too late. I know in my heart it’s possible. Know this, it’s your idea, your future dream and no one, especially your own big little voice, should be judging you.

You only feel good from others

Sure we all love being validated for what we do, however if your worth is based on other people constantly building you up, you are then setting yourself for a fall. Your big little voice will find that open door with a cosy welcome mat underneath. 

So, what shall we do about this… write things you like about yourself. At least 50. Then things you’re going to be great at. This time at least 60. Seems a big ask, but listen you need it. You are in charge of your self worth and self esteem. Self worth is what you feel about yourself, which in turn fuels your self esteem when you feel good, you develop more confidence and this leads to more self esteem. It’s an ever growing circle.